Complicated?

My stack of pennies isn't high enough yet. Let's see if I can borrow some? ...I feel like a kid trying to get an advance on his allowance...

*sigh* If only I was done with school. If only I had a "real" job. Not that I want a "real" job...it's just that they theoretically pay more. I don't know how that works, it's just a theory. Maybe I just need to learn to be happy with nothing, then I wouldn't need to work much, wouldn't need to go to school, could sit and watch the world unfold.

Life is mostly too complicated, really. Take 'love' for instance. Romantic love is comparable to a chemical imbalance observed in people who have an obsessive/compulsive disorder. That's a truly unsettling thought. As if you could administer medication to "take care of that love problem you've got..." I suppose it's absurd. Yeah, especially considering the layers of love. Superficially it is about chemistry, biology, attraction, the clothes you wear, the car you drive... (now I'll have to wonder if possessing an automobile is fundamentally some kind of primping activity, compensation for bad tan lines etc.)

Beyond the superficial, love is deep. Like a hole in the ground. If you fall into it, you just don't know what will come of it. Maybe you'll discover a bat cave underneath the Wayne mansion and turn into a masked superhero. Alternately, you could simply break some bones and get a concussion. If you dig deep enough you might find diamonds, but if the time isn't right maybe all you'll get is coal. It's a mystery to me; one that tends to elicit cynicism.

How did I end up on this horrible tangent? Oh yes. Life is complicated. That's not so bad actually. It makes things interesting. Life Is Beautiful Every day, somewhere, a flower blossoms or a rainbow hangs in the sky.

Ah, it's this album... it's making me wistful, contemplative... but I need to go to sleep. This week is just my week of grasping at moonbeams and chasing rainbows. Next week I'll look for something constructive to do. Like sleep when it's night.